Friday - US Embassy

Well, my internet connection has not been working. They set me up to connect to an unsecured wireless network, which worked until yesterday afternoon. Since then, nothing. I called to let them know and the lady said I should try to restart the modem. Hello! I'm not using the modem! The computer guys couldn't get that to work and set me up on wireless, and now that is not working. They're going to have someone call me Saturday - their computer expert works 10-6. We'll see. I tried a different wireless and was able to connect, so will save this as I go. Don't be surprised if it ends abruptly, midthought!

Thanks to everyone who has posted - I love hearing your comments and feeling that you are sharing this "Excellent Adventure" with me! (Don - love the title!)

Yesterday was our visit to the American Embassy, but first some random thoughts.

As most small children, Amanda seeks notice/praise for every small penmark on an empty notebook page, and every crayon mark. I didn't notice how often I said, "Good job!" until she started repeating it back. I think it's her first official American phrase, she says it after every accomplishment: folding her clothes and putting them in the suitcase, taking them out and folding them again, etc. It's cute, because it sounds like "Pee-cha!"

Also with most small children, she seems pretty klutzy! She was going after a balloon and slipped and bonked her lip on the wood frame of the bed (not a great kid design). I thought she would have a big fat lip, and I noticed today that it is maybe a bit swollen, but nowhere what I thought it would be after the strike. I have moved all the rugs out of the way (tile or fake wood floors) and have her wearing her tennis shoes all the time, which helps.

She's definitely an actress, which is what they said when we visited the orphanage on trip 1. What I didn't realize was how she would employ the talent - pretending to be upset at something and then eventually just grinning. When she really does hurt herself, she stops and just freezes inside herself. It seems sad to me. The "normal" child reaction is to cry and run to Mama, but she hasn't had that option, so right now, Mama runs to her. I think she has started to enjoy when I try to kiss everything better. =)

I forgot to mention that, as I had learned from other parents' experiences but had forgotten, the Russian medical doctor chided me for helping her dress. He said that they are taught to be independent in the orphanage and I should not change that or I will be doing it until she's 30. Well, truth to the independence but maybe we can find a compromise and let Mama fuss a bit! I know the doctor told Chris & Carie, and also Elizabeth, that the baby will seek attention for anything and you should not always give in and go to him/her. Well, who doesn't want to spoil a new baby who hasn't had a mommy/daddy? There's always time for unspoiling as needed, but more important to show the child that someone is there.

So, our Friday: We headed out to find McDonald's on Old Arbat. There was signage pointing forward and then to the right, so we took the right down a side street with lots of slush and bad sidewalks and ended up ... back on New Arbat, across from our apartment. Great morning exercise but not really the goal. We went back to Old Arbat and ditched the McD's idea and headed for our standby, Sbarro. I wasn't sure they would be open at 10am, but they were. There were no plain pizzas with meat topping so I got two "supreme" looking slices. I figured I'd pull the mushrooms and onions off, but it turns out Amanda was my clean-up crew on that, so that worked out great.

We walked back leisurely, with Amanda pushing the stroller, and stopped in the corner grocery store. It's very tiny, with basically one small aisle and different little sections, each with its own employee, and you pay at each section, so if you need things in each section, you could end up paying 5 different times. I bought yogurt and hotdogs in one section (I hope they're hotdogs). I had taken along a game piece from Amanda's memory game, the piece that had a picture of a hotdog in a bun with ketchup, etc., on it and showed it to the lady. She looked at me like I was crazy, then looked at the piece again and finally smiled as I was gesturing to the display with the hotdogs and other items. I agree with her that it was a funny way to communicate, but it worked! I forgot apple juice again, but have promised Amanda and myself that today I will buy some! We made our way back to the apartment and only had time for about an hour's nap and then got ready for the embassy trip.

Oksana called to tell me that Dimitri was downstairs waiting, so we went down. He had to step out of his car and wave, otherwise I had no idea what vehicle/person I was looking for. Then 5 minutes to the Elizabeth's building, and Amanda & I went inside to show them where the car was waiting, as it was the back of the building and the van driver had dropped us off in the front, so I didn't think Elizabeth would know where to find us. It took more than 5 minutes or so for Elizabeth to come down, and when we got out to the car, Dimitri wasn't there! He came from the front just a few moments later - I'm guessing he didn't know I'd gone in the building and was wondering where we all were!

Oksana met us at the embassy, and I asked her to tell Amanda that we would get to a bathroom in just a few moments! This girl needs to peeseet every time I turn around! She started crying in the car on the way after she told me she needed to peeseet and I said dah, dah, pat minoot (5 minutes)! We presented our "invitation" and passports to guards and went inside, through security, where I had to check my camera (duh! Cameras would not be allowed in the Embassy - I didn't bring it along on purpose but just still had it in my pocket). Then off to find the nearest toilet! Success on that front, then we were directed back to just past security, where I had blown past the machine which prints out a number for the adoption process (as in, take a number). The invitation gave instructions, but in my haste to find a bathroom... Then down the hallway, up a few stairs, pay $400 at window 4, take the receipt to window 6, get another receipt type paper (I think), and then to the waiting room with maybe 5 rows of chairs 10 wide, with maybe 5 along both side walls, where lots of other adoptive parents were waiting. Nice to be in a group of Americans! (Well, the adults, anyway.) We took some seats in the 2nd row and Amanda proceeded to be a wriggling ball of energy. I spun her around and bounced her on my knee, all the while looking at the other parents with their children sitting in their seats, being quite sedate in comparison. When I was called up to the window for my turn, Amanda wouldn't stand up, so I put her up on the counter aside me. The guy behind the glass (a Kansasan, originally) said it was all, she could didn't have to sit there. I just looked at him and told him if I put her down, she would run away. He said, ok, that's fine! In retrospect, I recall a parent going up without the child and the other parent having to stand up and hold the child up so the window guy could see his face (verify that they weren't switching kids?) so maybe he thought I put her up there so he could see her, but it was strictly a necessity! At one point I had her sitting on my shoulder, and he held the paper so I could sign with just one hand. The next paper, I had her bouncing off my left leg and he held that paper so I could sign. A regular jumping bean! (Uh, Angie, we might need a plan B if I going to be singing at your wedding March 1st! Do you have any teenage cousins who could take her out during the service for me???)

Then back to wait for my name to be called and I received her Russian passport with an American visa, or something like that, along with a manilla envelope not to be opened except by Immigration on return to the US. Also the translated Russian documents which I haven't had a chance to look at (her birth certificate and adoption certificate, maybe medical records?). Important stuff, you would think I would have looked already.

While I waited for the passport callback, Amanda and I ended up playing a "game" where she pretended she was running away from me, I sternly said, "Come back to Mama" with my hands on my hips, she slowly returned and I praised her up and down and hugged her. We did this maybe 10 times and I thought, all right already! But I was so pleased that she understood the process. We'll see if it helps or if it was just a fun game.

Then out the door, around the building to an outside window to pick up our checked items and back to the apartment by 3:30. Quick appointment! The rest of the afternoon I spent cooking the chicken while Amanda colored/wrote with the pen, etc. She was pretty bored with the fact that I was tied to the stove. Then we had some of the leftover soup with some of the chicken (I wish I had brought along more of that instant soup - it was great and she loved it!). Another bath and bed about 8pm. The guy called me at 8:30 to address my inability to find English channels. We had just gotten started when SOMEONE left bed and walked over and pushed the button, HANGING UP THE CALL! Augh! I was not happy, as I had told her to stay put, and earlier had told her the phone was off limits! She went back to the bed and cried, while I talked to the guy after he called back. I described my setup and he said he'd check with someone. He called back a few minutes later and said (no surprise) I was right and the apartment doesn't have satellite but just regular TV which is all Russian. I hadn't necessarily been expecting English TV, but when I called and asked I constantly was told that yes, I have English channels and I should be able to figure it out. So, I told the guy maybe it would be smart to make a note in the files that this apartment does NOT have English channels so the next person doesn't get the same routine.

I then comforted my crying girl, and asked her, "What did Mama say?" (a phrase she recognizes by meaning, if not by actual words), and she answered, "Mama say nyet!". She then made a sweeping gesture over the phone and said "Mama say nyet!" with much emphasis and drama. She does this with the stove, and the buttons on the front of the TV, and the computer, but she still can't seem to follow through all the time. Oh well, baby steps, and I make sure that I reinforce that nyet means nyet! Otherwise we will make no progress, especially out in public, which is her most out-of-control time.

If you want to see pictures of our apartment, this link should work:
http://www.go-russia.com/apartmentsdetails.php?id=4
I worried because it appeared that there were no kitchen chairs, but found the reason is that there are two backless stools, just a bit too tall for Amanda to get up on easilly, although she does manage.

That was our Friday. It's now Saturday night and we're about to go visit an American couple staying in the building - our first social visit! I had seen them outside the apartment building and heard them talking, so I said hello, and today we met in the elevator and decided I'd stop by tonight. They got their little boy Liam yesterday, so we probably won't stay long.

TTFN, Kathy =)